Information & advice

Please note, we have used ‘neighbour disputes’ in the FAQs below, but disputes may also be between residents and their housing providers/landlords and/or the scheme managers and staff. The principles of mediation would be the same.

How is mediation used in neighbour disputes?

What does mediation involve?

Who decides on the outcome?

Do people have to meet with their neighbours?

Do people have to use mediation?

What if one neighbour is very aggressive?

What if one person is in the wrong?

What if previous attempts to reason with one party have failed?

Does it work?

 

How is mediation used in neighbour disputes? 
When neighbours are experiencing conflict with each other, a mediator can help them speak to each other (either directly or indirectly) about the problem and work out their own way of resolving it. Mediation provides a structured, safe and focused way of talking about the problem and the solutions, with the help of an impartial, independent third party. It is also relatively quick and informal, and it gives all parties a chance to have their say. The process recognises that most neighbours have to live very closely to each other and allows them to work out how they would like to do it.
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What does mediation involve?
If it seems that mediation would be useful, and both parties are willing to try it, the mediator will arrange to see each party separately for up to an hour, in a pre-meeting. The mediator will then hold a meeting between the parties, giving them a chance to talk directly and reach a mutually acceptable agreement about the problems. This usually takes up to two hours.
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Who decides on the outcome?
The parties themselves, not the mediator, decide the term of the agreement.
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Do people have to meet with their neighbours?
It is best if the parties meet directly, because this helps them to listen to one another and understand the other person’s point of view. But sometimes it is not possible for parties to meet, because of geographical distance or problems of access. In such cases the mediator can arrange to ‘shuttle’ between the parties, helping them reach a resolution by going back and forth between them.
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Do people have to use mediation?
Mediation is a voluntary process, so people need to choose to try it and need to be willing to negotiate in good faith. Mediation is also confidential, so there are no records of what was said in a mediation session. This means that people can speak openly and honestly.
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What if one neighbour is very aggressive?
Before a mediation meeting is held, the mediator meets separately with each party. This pre-meeting is a chance to assess if there are any particular issues to address in terms of support, help, timing of the session, and who will attend. The mediator can also assess whether both parties feel safe in attending the meeting and negotiating an agreement. Sometimes people do get heated during the mediation meeting because of their frustration with the situation, but the mediator’s role is to manage the session, call for breaks if necessary, and even end the session if it isn’t constructive.
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What if one person is in the wrong?
Mediators recognise that no disputes are the same. Sometimes one party is experiencing noise and the other party is unaware that they are causing any problems. Sometimes parties have different lifestyles, or one party feels complained about when they are not doing anything out of order or when they can’t change the situation.

Mediation allows for a ‘two-headed coin’. In other words, it recognises that there are different viewpoints to each situation, and that for a problem to get sorted out it needs both sides to be acknowledged or recognised. So each party needs to explain how they are affected by the situation and what they would like changed or done differently. The people involved in the situation can make the best decisions about what works for them.
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What if previous attempts to reason with one party have failed?
Mediation can work even when other attempts to get the parties talking have failed. This is because it brings in an independent person, the mediator, who has not been involved in the situation and has no preconceived views as to how it should be resolved. The mediator’s job is to listen to all parties and help them identify what the problems are and what might be the best way to resolve them. Mediation sessions are sometimes the first time that parties are talking face to face, and the effect can be very powerful.
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Does it work?
Mediation depends on the willing participation of those involved in the conflict. If they really want to resolve the situation and are prepared to sit with their neighbour, listen to what they have to say and work through some possible solutions, it can be a really effective way of sorting out problems.
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To contact AIMS:

Address:
AIMS
Age Concern England
Astral House
1268 London Road
London SW16  4ER

Telephone:
020 8765 7465

Lo-call helpline:
0845 600 2001
(open 9.30am-4.30pm
Mon-Fri)

Email: AIMS